What Does It Mean to Be a Man? | Letter to a Friend #15

Hey friend,

Thursday is the new Sunday. Welcome to a late letter - no apologies (you don't pay me for this, do you?)
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I'm thinking about becoming a man. What does that even mean? How do you do it? More specifically, how do you do it without a father? As I covered briefly in a past letter, my dad has been pre-occupied with preparing for the world to end for the last 20+ years. So much so that, whether he'll admit it or not, my brother and I have taken somewhat of a back-seat, particularly after he and my mom divorced in 2014.
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Starting in 2017, I became obsessed with personal development, living a full life I could be proud of, and achieving as much as I could. How much of that has to do with the fact that I didn't have a dad around? I'll skip the self-psychoanalysis (for now), but I'd guess more than I'm aware of.
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This has gotten me thinking of all the other guys my age who haven't had strong father figures to teach them what it means to be a man you can be proud of, take care of others, and overall how to live a good life. What can I do to help myself and others with similar backgrounds/struggles get the mentorship needed to learn these things? How can I re-create the rites of passage towards manhood that used to exist in tribes and aided a boy in his transformational journey?
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Lots of questions, lots of ideas, and therefore lots to experiment with. I'm feeling this is the direction I'm going to be heading with the online stuff I put out (Youtube, this, etc.). I don't know what that will look like exactly, and it will almost certainly change and evolve over time, but the general topic feels right.
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If any of the above resonated with you or you have any tips/ideas, I would absolutely love for you to respond to this email and let me know your thoughts! I am only one person and one experience, but I know that while the details of my experience might be unique, the struggles are not.
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Much love and talk next week!
Ryan

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